MindYourBusyNess: August 2009


In every organization / society, there is large number of written/unwritten rules. Generally we are aware of the overview of rules only and not its complete details (unless you are involved directly with these rules in your work).

It is when we (or someone close to us) face problem(s) and go into details, many times we find that rules applicable are outdated, illogical inadequate etc.

Have you also gone through similar situation? Did you blame the system /organization/ authority for this? Were you compelled to resort to cheating to bye pass the rule?

Generally rules are formed to benefit the large cross-section of society. Therefore when these are applied to particular individual in a particular circumstance, it may appear sometime that true justice is being denied to some individual(s).

Whenever a breach of rule comes to notice, the rule applicable at that point of time is referred. It can not be changed for any one, whatsoever compelling circumstances one may have. It may initiate a call for revision of rule but the benefit of revised rule may not go to that individual who initiated that revision. It’s a paradox.

If the society is orthodox, the rule revision will be rare. In an advanced or modern society, it may be frequent.

Like two extreme type of societies, there are two extreme of individuals. These are law abiding citizens and law breaking offenders.

When law does not benefit some individual in some circumstances, the respect to it starts eroding in his/her mind. If such occurrence is repeated many times the mind position begins to shift from ‘law abiding’ to ‘law breaking’. If the experiences of ‘law breaking’ are encouraging, it becomes a habit. The habit, if not checked, can lead us to become branded criminals.

What can we do to remain the law abiding citizens?

The answer lies in our reactions to an experience of finding the weakness in the law. Given below are tips for handling such experience-

Imperfection is O.K. We should accept it as a natural phenomenon. The myth that ‘law is perfect’ is to be reconsidered. ‘Law’, like anything else, is evolving and dynamic.
We should learn to respect it as it is.

Emotional reactions There is no need to collect negative feeling like guilt or anger in such experiences. Nor is any need to blame the authority or society. These are just mediums. They are neither ‘against’ nor ‘for’ any individual.

Rules are mere guidelines Consider rules as guidelines guiding us the correct way rather than some fixed barriers to be crossed or not crossed.

Spirit Do not get entrapped in the frame work of rules. Try to follow the spirit behind these rather than get disturbed by the details.

Make or break Analyze your emotions and reactions. Are these going to help ‘law makers’ or ‘law breakers’? Review if needed.


If you are interested in the theme of this blog ,you may be looking for the similar contents on the net. To help you on your search, given below are details of 10 such places -

http://www.theworkplaceblog.com target="blank As stated there ‘The Workplace offers engaging expert perspectives on trends, research, products, and other news about intranets, extranets, portals, information and knowledge management, enterprise 2.0, and emerging workplace solutions’ . There is lot of articles available here.

http://www.a-to-z-of-manners-and-etiquette.com This website has got good details covering etiquettes on various aspects. The relevant themes in the context are etiquettes at office, telephone, toilet, employee and employer.

http://www.thesite.org/workandstudy/working/workinglife It is a collection of good articles on various aspects like work place bullying, work life balance, work dress code ,first day hell etc.

http://www.allthingsworkplace.com A blog by Steve Roesler . As states by him it is for ‘Teaching smart people practical ways to become extraordinary’. It is a collection of nice articles on all aspects of workplace.

http://www.pandemicflu.gov/faq/workplace_questions Answer of common questions regarding workplace is given here. The site is specific to policies and rules in US.

http://www.abetterworkplace.com/ The site offers courses for individual and companies for making the workplace better.

http://www.workplacebullying.org/ contains lot of material on bullying at workplace.

http://www.microsoft.com/smallbusiness/resources/management/leadership-training/need-work-life-balance-7-tips.aspx#Needworklifebalancetips target="blank" this is collection of nice and informative articles on Microsoft site on ‘work life balance’.

http://resources.bnet.com/topic/boss+and+manager.html target="blank" A collection of nice articles on boss, manager and general management topics.

https://www.blogcatalog.com/blogs/workplace-diversity.html target="blank" It is a blog by diversityGirl. Many interesting articles are posted here.


Are you able to enjoy your meetings with new clients, officials or contractors? If this activity is dull and boring, then you need to learn the tricks to make it interesting. Interest can be created in any conversation in spite of a boring agenda or theme. To do that you have to do some work even before you utter a word. There are simple yet effective techniques which can be applied for making a lively connection with anyone. It doesn’t take much of you time –only few seconds are required. Given below are some such suggestions of pre dialogue warm starter techniques- Look for similarities –Look towards the other person and find some platform where you can identify with him on the same level. It could be a simple thing like using the same type of gadget, garment, hairstyle etc. Better would be to find some similarity on one of the following grounds/level- • Cultural • Ethnic • Interests • Habits Once you are able to find appropriate similarity, announce it in your opening dialogue. Don’t wait for other person to start the conversation. You take the lead to open the dialogue and establish contact on the basis of similarity found. You may be amazed to see how easily people open up and feel comfortable to talk to someone who is of the same type. However if the purpose of the meeting is to ask some favor from other party this technique may not work out. In that situation it is better to declare your real purpose first and then on the ground of similarity try to get help or soft corner of other person’s heart. Look for uniqueness- The other approach is to look for uniqueness in other person. It may be a very simple thing like hair style, phone or vehicle number, spelling of name etc. Everyone feels a psychological boost when it is declared that he/she is unique. So find uniqueness and declare it to establish a contact with other person. Starter line Can you co relate the meeting situation or any other item on meeting place with any phrase, quote, line of song/poetry etc. This can become a good starter. VIP Treatment Each one of us craves for a V.I.P. (Very Important Person) treatment in all the situations. So when you use the stereo type words like ‘you look great /smart /beautiful /gorgeous’ etc., these do have their effect on other person. If you sincerely give importance to the other person, he/she will at least listen to your point of view in a more open way. So treat him/her like a V.I.P.


Krishna’s reporting time for duty is 6 AM. She has to clean the office premises and cook breakfast for her 3 bosses of their choice and serve hot breakfast to each one of them. She remains so busy in her work that she never gets an opportunity to eat her breakfast properly. She just manages to munch few bites along with her work. She has to attend all visitors to the office throughout the day. Since the work schedule of her 3 bosses is different, most of the time one or other boss is available in the office. She is the common secretary for all three of them. She has to prepare lunch and dinner as per the demands of the bosses. Sometimes she has to organize several meeting and events in a day on the instruction of her bosses. All phone calls to the office are mostly attended by her. She works normally up to 11 pm but her reporting time remains same even if she works late night. She has got no weekly off and has not availed any type of leave since she joined the office. She is expected to work in following capacity simultaneously- • Secretary • Chef • Event manager • Manager –admin/housekeeping/ security • PRO • Storekeeper • Peon • Accountant • Governance • Receptionist She is a housewife and happens to be my life partner. I along with our two children boss around in the house. I salute her sincerity and dedication to work. All four of us works for the beautiful organization called ‘OUR FAMILY’ and assumes roles from peon/sweeper to CEO as per the requirement. I am proud to be a part of it.